Monday, July 30, 2007

I'm NOT Wild About Hairy

We went shopping at the local antique mall. It's one of the largest ones around with plenty of booths and all the old chotchkies you can shake a stick at.

My son and his friend love this place. They can't keep their hands off all the old stuff. They had to dial each and every old telephone. They had to identify the price value of every piece of jewelry. Even old purses got 'that's cool' remarks.

After an hour of browsing, we sat down at the snack area for a little break. It's a nice little place with several vending machines and free coffee. It was pretty busy for such a small area - two ladies were sorting some jewelry, and at another table, a couple sat conversing with a friend who, I noticed, never stopped talking.

We sat down at a table with three chairs. The kids were nibbling on their snacks, and I was drinking coffee. I noticed a tupperware container with fruit off to the side, but I thought it belonged to the couple next to us. After I finished my coffee, I got up to get some water from the water fountain. As I turned around, a man pulled up to the chair I was just sitting at, slowly swept my stuff to the side and sat in my seat at the table.

I stood there, dumbfounded, and he pretended not to see me. Nick and Matt sunk low in their chairs, their eyes darting from rude guy to me - I could tell they were as surprised as I was. The non-stop-talking man stopped long enough to pull an extra chair over for me to sit on, having noticed that our little table had just acquired one guest too many. The woman apologized for the guy, explaining that 10 minutes ago he was sitting there. Gee, my mistake.

Not two minutes later, the man stood up and pulled 'his' chair toward the two jewelry-sorting ladies. The boys whispered to me about how weird the whole episode was, but I was over it and just sipped my water. I relaxed, and looked over at a display that was adjacent to the snack area, when the boys began to make odd noises. I turned to see what they were doing, and was just about to tell them to cut it out, when my words logjammed in my throat.

My eyes rivited on what looked like a beige and gray flokati. but was actually Rude Guy's 60ish year old back. It took a few seconds for me to realize that, yes, that was his back, and no, he wasn't wearing a weird flesh and gray colored sweater. Nick and Matt were gasping for air, hunched over and laughing almost silently, with wet snorts sneaking out between breaths. I almost peed myself.

We hurried out of the area, off to where we thought we might be out of range, then burst out laughing. After we recovered, I asked my son why he thought the guy took off his shirt - Nick thought he had an itch. Why, I wondered, would a grown man strip in an eating area for an itch - to rub his back on a chair? The thought made me cringe. I silently hoped by the time we circled back, that his 'if it's not Scottish, it's crap" shirt would be back where it belonged. I didn't think my eyes, or my bladder, could handle it otherwise.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

First of all I would like to say great blog! I had a quick
question which I'd like to ask if you do not mind.
I was curious to know how you center yourself and clear your thoughts before writing.
I have had a tough time clearing my mind in getting my ideas out.
I do enjoy writing however it just seems like the first 10 to 15
minutes are lost just trying to figure out how to begin.

Any suggestions or tips? Appreciate it!

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So Cal Peeper said...

when i was actively writing for this blog, i didn’t much sit down and then think of something to write. I would go about my business for the day and look for and think of stuff to write about.

If an idea came to me, i’d write the idea down somewhere for later (important for me to do that, or i’d forget.)

I just start writing. I don’t worry about how it starts off, whether it’s bad or good. Sometimes, i would start writing, and go off on a tangent which was better than the initial idea. It was best for me to just write something, anything, to get started.

thanks for reading!